Green Lantern

There have been some very clever video games that are very clever because they almost feel like movies. Then there are very clever video games that are definitely video games, forcing you to absorb copious amounts of back story in order to fully understand the universe you’re playing in. Well, Green Lantern feels like the second one but with two obvious differences. Firstly, it’s a movie. Secondly, it’s terrible. What works for a video game cannot be compressed into 100 minutes of confusing montages, rushed exposition and hammy dialogue.

The film opens with a sequence clearly designed for 3D (a medium that the rest of the film blissfully ignored) that explains some boring and complex back story that only people who have read the comics could possibly be interested in. Like last month’s Thor the story then flits between alien worlds and earth and, like Thor, it has trouble with the separation of these two locations. Ryan Reynolds’ cocky pilot is perfectly at home in his comfortable human world of abortive storylines (Nephew, what? Drone testing, what?) but when he’s up in the stars the whole film is dwarfed by the complexity of the universe that they’ve created. The rest of the cast try to make an impact but Peter Sarsgaard’s villain is so pathetic that the only threat comes from an under-explained ash cloud squid. I thought I’d enjoy seeing Blake Lively in 3D but, to be honest, if that shoot was hard work for her then I’ll be damned.

There aren’t actually any redeeming features because this is such a hotchpotch of generic comic book movie motifs that at every turn I was thinking of better examples. Daddy issues? Watch Batman. Workplace sexual tension? Iron Man. Bad car parking? Naked Gun. Clearly there was money in the production and Martin Campbell is a more than competent director, but somewhere along the line someone forgot to make an interesting film. The result is a turgid mess of a movie that will be forgotten almost as quickly as it slips down the box office rankings.

Fragments of better movies get stitched together into a patchwork of mediocrity. Pointless.

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